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December 31, 2005
I passed
(Excuse me, it's hard to type while I eat Christmas chocolates and cookies.)
The bedrest gods have decided it was in their best interest to not give me gestational diabetes.
I not only passed, I passed with flying colors. A normal fasting level of glucose is 70-110. I started with 84. After four hours of still no eating but that icky orange stuff in my system, my level was 54.
No wonder I almost passed out in the car.
See, I NEED the Big Mac to prevent blackouts.
Posted by janna at 08:55 AM | Comments (0)
December 26, 2005
Christmas 2005
Here are some snapshots of our day.
Highlights include:
-A tent in our living room left by Santa.
-Spontaneous hugs from Gus for most everyone.
-Sock monkey pajamas from Mom for John and I. I won't admit that I'm still wearing them. The day after Christmas. At 6:15 in the evening. That's just excessive.
-Getting a stalkerazzi long lense for my camera...I can take pictures from my couch perch, no matter where you are. Beware.
-Creating a long table for 12 people in our dining room. Can we say EXCUSE ME? It was a bit tight, but we're family.
-Watching Gus pass out on the couch with a chocolate-covered cookie in his hand. Our couch has a lasting memento from this moment.
-With our fifth Christmas now behind us, I can conclusively say that it is absolutely impossible to surprise John but always possible to surprise me. I never ask John what he wants for Christmas because it's a personal challenge to myself to find something that really suits him...I think I'll have to start planning now for next year.
-Having Baby E boogie around a lot. He did not want to be left out.
-My favorite: A group of us dancing to the Hokey Pokey Elmo at the end of the night. Even bedrest Janna was doing a version.
-Mount Consumerism on our back porch. The pile of boxes is astonishing. I think we've done our part to keep the economy going.
I might change my clothes tomorrow. Honest.
Posted by janna at 05:34 PM | Comments (0)
Favorite gift?
I'm sitting in our basement right now, two new fish swimming around in the tank, listening to the activity going on upstairs. I hear Zeppo's nails slidding around the wood floor, I hear John telling Zeppo to stay, sit... I also hear the bounce of a ball. A hard ball. A ball that makes video game noises when it hits the floor.
This was not only Christmas for the people. It was Christmas for the Zeppo.
She puts up with a lot, that Zeppo girl, and she deserved some treats. This hard, red, flashing and noise-making ball was just one of the few things that graced her gift bag.
Yes, she had a gift bag, you got something to say about it?
It was a left-over Clifford bag from a birthday gift Gus received. Zeppo actually discovered it on Christmas Eve. She sat in front of it for a really long time, finally convincing me to break part of it out early. I gave her a new squeaky hedgehog toy.
That was the same toy I heard her playing with at 5:30 the next morning.
You're such a kid, Zeppo.
Posted by janna at 10:45 AM | Comments (0)
December 24, 2005
Merry Christmas!
Posted by janna at 01:46 PM | Comments (0)
Now here's a bun in the oven...
31 weeks today!
Posted by janna at 01:45 PM | Comments (0)
December 23, 2005
It wasn't so bad
I completed my marathon fasting/bloodwork regime yesterday at 10:45. The 'three-hour' part only starts after they've established your blood sugar isn't so crazy high even after fasting. As the nurse so aptly put it, "We're not going to give you all that sugar if you already have a high level." Right... makes sense.
I must say, I have never gotten so much work done in a three-hour period of time. Laptop in tow, I sat in the waiting room, listing to smooooooth jazz. Initially I was a little concerned that I was going to go OUT OF MY MIND listening to more than three hours of it, but I eventually found myself tapping my foot. That's called adapting, my friends!
When I came out of the hosptial, John and my Mom were there to pick me up. In all of my excitement to see my Mom, I made myself completely lightheaded and almost fainted in the car. We went out to eat!!! at a place that serves you a basket of popcorn while you look at the menu. I ate almost two baskets. I think I scared John.
Now I'm back, in my humble abode, in my comfy pants, until next Thursday. I love Thursdays...no matter what they bring.
Posted by janna at 10:12 AM | Comments (1)
December 20, 2005
Confessions of the worst kind
I thought I was being so funny. The story goes like this:
Ha, ha, ha, I'm just hilarious.
I had to take my one-hour glucose test, the one that would tell me if I need to get tested further for risk of gestational diabetes. Even though I had to fast for the same test while pregnant with Gus, the rules had changed with my doctor. You're no longer forced to fast as a lot of women were getting sick after drinking the sickly sweet orange stuff. I had no problem keeping it down before, I thought it tasted like a thick Fanta, but since the doc said no fasting, I wasn't going to fast.
Not only was I NOT going to fast, I was going to take advantage of a) being in a car, and b) being outside of doors for the first time in a week by asking my loving husband to please, PLEASE, please take me through the McDonald's drive-thru. For the love of your unborn child, take me, I say!
So he did. One hour before my glucose test. He ordered exactly what I wanted: Big Mac, fries, and a Coke. I ate it in the car on the way to the hospital. I laughed occasionally, ha, ha, ha, look at me, eating McDonald's right before my test, ha, ha, ha, I'm so silly.
[Now, here's a good time to pause the story and to highlight the fact that I am normally a really intelligent gal, if I may say so myself. I am full of common sense, often cautious to a fault, and can really solve a good puzzle. I went to college, grad school...I can get jobs...good jobs. I'm smart!]
I took the test.
I failed.
I failed by ONE POINT.
141.
I needed to be below 140.
This means that I have to take a THREE HOUR glucose test. I thought that meant I came in, drank stuff, then three hours later came back and had my blood drawn.
Oh, you silly, silly, woman, who is laughing now?
Oh no. Starting tomorrow night, at 7pm, you can no longer eat anything. Nothing. Water and ice chips are on your menu. You have to be a the hospital at 7 AM on Thursday, where you will have your blood drawn immediately. Then you will have to drink TWICE the amount of thick Fanta. Then you will come back EVERY HOUR for THREE HOURS and have your blood drawn.
Big Mac, fries and a coke + thick fanta + one blood-drawing session + some light-hearted laughs?
=$fasting + double fanta + four blood-drawing sessions
Ah, some sayings come to mind now...
"You reap what you sow."
"You've made your bed, now lie in it."
"You can't have your Big Mac and eat it, too."
Posted by janna at 10:35 PM | Comments (2)
The words keep coming
Gus is telling stories these days. Lately he has been laughing to himself, saying, "Funny Papa.... snowballs".
He's remembering the time almost two weeks ago when John was shoveling snow outside as we watched through the door. Our storm door has windows almost all the way down, so we could sit on the floor and watch as Papa shoveled away, staying a wee bit warmer than he was.
John would occasionally gather up some snow into a snowball and throw it at the door, splatting right in our faces. Every time it made Gus' mouth open wide, eyes big, super excited.
"MORE SNOWBALLS!" we would yell through the door.
Gus talks about other memories, too... playing cars with Danny, the funny school bus story Mama made up one night... When he starts telling a story, he has this look on his face, like he's really trying to pull all the words together and spit them out but it's just not even possible. It's amazing.
All this goes to show that Gus is remembering stuff, and we need to be sure that he has lots of really good things to remember and very few of the bad ones to conjur.
Posted by janna at 07:40 PM | Comments (0)
December 18, 2005
We really are
They're gone.
But did I mention that we've kept the snail alive? We have a snail, the ph of the water is perfect now, no ammonia...John has become an expert in aquarium care.
We'll introduce some new fish in a few days. Once we're not so scared to.
Sorry, fishies. We had intended to have you for 15 years, honest.
Posted by janna at 09:35 PM | Comments (1)
December 16, 2005
We might be, ummm...
fish killers.
Right now, singular FISH has perished.
Second fish is looking, ummm, not so good.
For some reason the fish we didn't name 'passed'. The orange one, Hiccup, is holding on (or at least was this morning).
I thought fish were supposed to be easy?
We have filters. We have stuff for the water. We've fed them.
We think they came with 'ick'. How appropriate, a disease called 'ick'. We treated them for ick. Seemed like it worked. Then suddenly it didn't.
Can we have a 'do over'? Our son's birthday presents are, ummm, not working out. I think he might notice soon.
Posted by janna at 05:17 PM | Comments (0)
December 15, 2005
First it began with lasagna
It was innocent enough.
Our friend Jennifer called one day and said, "Mark accidentally made a second pan of lasagna. May I drop it by?"
Then we received a gift card to Boston Market from my Mom, for several meals' worth of quick pick-ups.
Word then spread to our block that I was doing a little, umm, ass-sitting for the next eight weeks, and suddenly people were signing up to bring us food every few days.
Now some friends have asked a personal chef to come to our house and make us five dishes, which consist of four meals each. Basically, this guy is going to do some fancy bulk cooking for us.
People, I know there are a lot of downsides to bedrest, believe me, but starving we are not. In all seriousness, I have to say, the generosity and kindness of others has totally blown me away these past two weeks. I was initially so worried about John being overwhelmed with having to take on all of the major tasks we normally shared. Having to barely 'make' dinner reduces so much stress, it's amazing.
So thanks, thanks, thanks to all who have helped us out with dinner, and thanks to all for all of your incredible encouragement.
This bedrest thing is going to be a breeze.
ps. 30 weeks on Saturday! Six more weeks!
Posted by janna at 06:47 PM | Comments (0)
December 11, 2005
Possessive
The other night, Gus came home with John, and it was like some new synapses had connected in his brain.
"It's Nina's..."
"It's Danny's..."
Everything was possessive.
That night, after reading books in his bead, Gus and I were talking about the day. Out they came again... "It's Nina's..." I knew from John that he was talking about how he pointed out each coat at daycare and told John whose coat it was.
Then Gus fell asleep.
Then Gus woke up. At 11:30. He was coughing a bit, so John brought him to the guest room and I was going to sleep with him there. Suddenly Gus was just very awake and very lucid. Then came the possessives. Again. Umm, Gus? It's time for rest.
At one point, John brought some water for both of us. Gus initially said, pointing to my water glass, "It's Papa's water." About 15 minutes later, with his head on the pillow, Gus suddenly belts out, "NO! NO! Not Papa's water, it's MAMA's water."
Oh my god... it's well past midnight at this point, and I'm thinking, ok, don't laugh. I just turned over and left him to his brain.
Posted by janna at 09:31 AM | Comments (0)
December 07, 2005
T W O
Two happens to be Gus' favorite number right now.
You give him one cracker, he says, "I want TWO crackers."
If he sees anything more than one car, ranging from two to 50, he says, "TWO cars!"
Seems fitting that the boy is TWO years old.
How is this possible, that we have a singing, mimicking, funny, highly-entertaining, sometimes precocious, two-year old?
Gus woke up to us singing Happy Birthday to him. We brought him down to the now (practically) FINISHED basement (yippee, John!) to show him his birthday surprise:
Two fish. His very own. It's Gus' job to feed them in the morning and at night. He is a boy now obsessed.
We then moved on to breakfast. Birthday cake. Well, birthday cupcakes. Ok, they were carrot cake...and as you can see by Gus' initial reaction, he was kind of taken aback. That is a look saying, "You call THIS birthday cake??" It was only the first round of the day, no worries. We were trying to get Gus good and sugared for daycare.
Gus has been struggling with a bad cough, so he stayed home today, and John worked from home. At least he got out and about on his birthday.
Due to the cough, Gus woke up awfully early this morning. We snuggled on the couch together, until suddenly he popped up and said, "Pee pee! Poo poo! Come on!"
I was dumbfounded. There was NO way he was suddenly entering his second year WANTING to use the toilet?
I followed him into the bathroom. Since he's moving much faster than me these days, he was standing there, by the toilet. He patted the toilet seat and said, "Come on, Mama!"
Oh.
You're right, I guess I should go.
Posted by janna at 07:33 PM | Comments (1)
December 04, 2005
Countdown embodied
It's one thing to look at a calendar and know how long you'll be in the house.
(and trust me, I hope I'm here that long, I'm quite scared of the possibility of going into labor early)
It's another to make a visual, HAPPY reminder that the stay is finite, that each day that passes is a day closer to great health for all of us.
I gave Gus some paper to draw on...with Sharpies. Yes, I gave my toddler markers. That's the kind of mood I'm in. Have fun, the table will clean up just fine. He drew helicopters and whales and happiness. I then cut all the paper into strips, 55 to be exact. One strip for each day until we hit the 36 week mark. Each morning, starting tomorrow, we'll take off one ring, as a family.
At first, John was asking me if I really wanted to see how long the chain was... It is rather daunting. I think I'll look at it like a Christmas calendar, where there's a piece of chocolate you get every day for your continued patience. Maybe once Gus and John leave in the morning, I'll go raid Gus' Halloween candy.
Posted by janna at 08:22 PM | Comments (0)
December 03, 2005
Ode to John
The kind of guy you would want as a dad is the kind of guy who says this in a very calm, non-threatening, non-angry, non-judgemental manner:
"Umm, no foot in your lunch."
(lunch was spaghetti, foot was bare)
Posted by janna at 01:43 PM | Comments (0)
December 02, 2005
Repeat after me
It's just temporary.
Temporary.
Temporary.
It will be ok.
Hardest parts so far:
-Not being able to pick Gus up when he cries for me.
-Hearing Gus ask for Mama in the car when John called me.
-Not being able to fall asleep easily due to a gazillion things running through my head.
-Not going to work with John. I will miss our morning commute together.
Easiest parts so far:
-Sitting on the couch while John made me dinner (not a new phenomenon at all, I must admit.)
-Playing with Gus...he was great at climbing up on the couch, fetching new books and toys for us to play with.
-Putting Gus to bed...I curled up with him and read him books and fell asleep with him. I really needed that. Thank goodness he's not in a crib, that would have been tight.
-Having breakfast with Gus, his sweetness flowing around me like a cool salve. He is totally good medicine.
-Having John stop to kiss me and hug me at the exact moments I need it. He's going to get good and tired of me saying THANK YOU at every turn.
It's all good, it will be fine. Every day will be easier. Just stay in there, baby D2! Tomorrow is 28 weeks!
Posted by janna at 08:16 AM | Comments (1)
December 01, 2005
Here we go again
I know what bedrest is. I've been there, done that.
So when I was told this morning that I would be going on bedrest, one would think that I would just shrug and sigh and easily say, ok!
Oh no.
First came the expletive of the F kind, to which my doctor replied, "Well, that's one way to put it."
Then came the explosive, wracking tears that came and went for about an hour.
I went into labor and delivery to be put on a monitor, to see if I was having additional contractions that I wasn't aware of. I wasn't. Huge relief. That means I'm not on medication, at least yet, and that means I don't need to stay overnight in the hospital to be monitored. A small victory.
So yes, I may know bedrest, but I don't know THIS bedrest. I don't know bedrest with a toddler. I don't know bedrest without the supposed security blanket of medication...
But I do know this:
It's better to figure out what this bedrest is all about than to have a premature baby born at almost 28 weeks.
It's better for Gus to not have me pick him up for nine weeks than it is for me to be spending three months going back and forth to the hospital to take care of a premie.
It's better for me to work from home than to try to figure out what exactly it is about my days that have allowed me to get to this point.
Where my cervix was 'thick and long' a month ago, it is now half the length, and just ever-so-slightly dialated, just a fingertip.
Baby is doing very well, moving and kicking and his heartrate was fantastic. He's great, and thankfully so.
I can't beat myself up for this as I don't even really know what it is about the last month that caused it, but I silently berate myself every so often for the frequent lifting of things, for rushing to meetings, for just generally keeping up a silly pace when slowness and deliberateness was called for. But that's neither here nor there. It's done. Now my goal is to keep said cervix at 50% until I'm at 36 weeks. I did it with Gus, I can do it with *****.
It's better for me to pass the 'everything' torch to my sweet, sweet John, even though it is going to be difficult to just sit back and watch him juggle everything. I've already promised to keep up the good Peapod fight, so at least one weekly chore is off his plate. And bills! I can do bills. I even think I can give Gus a bath if he puts Gus in the bathtub, but I don't know if John agrees with me. I am so lucky to have John with me on this crazy journey.
But now I must turn to the ever-present positives:
1. I don't need to buy snow boots now, or at least until February.
2. I have a great excuse for not fixing my hair everyday.
3. I don't have to worry about going into labor at work downtown.
4. I really don't have to worry about having a long labor now since my cervix is obviously getting ready early.
5. I'm lucky that John works where I work and can bring stuff back and forth for me.
6. I no longer have easy access to McDonald's, and therefore will most likely not gain as much weight as I would have out in the world.
It's funny, I think I really knew it was going to happen today, I had felt some changes going on but I wanted to just brush them off to being normal growing pains. But I knew.
Here's the countdown, folks: We need to keep baby D2 in there for at least 57 more days. January 28th is when I'll be 36 weeks.
It's only 57 days, right?
We're getting cable.
Posted by janna at 04:57 PM | Comments (3)